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child custody?

Posted on 05/10/2004
by jonah

I'm starting my academy on June 2nd for 4 mos. And low and behold my marriage has hit the rocks, I may be forced with a divorce during or shortly after the academy. We have a one and a half year old daughter together. I was wondering if anyone out there has experience of sharing child custody with a kelly schedule? I love my daughter very much and I want to spend as much time with her as I can.. Any help or words of advise would be appreciated..Thanks


Posted on 05/11/2004
by awdwrd

I'm really sorry, jonah. Can you guys get counselling? I hope you and your wife can find the same common ground that made you fall in love and get married. Divorce is tough on everyone, as I am sure you are well aware.

Good Luck,
Nicole



Posted on 05/12/2004
by Paul

What a terriblwe turn of events. Here the two of you work toward you becomming a firefi9ghter and now that you have finally reached your goal you are getting divorced.

I agree with Nicole, give counseling a shot.

No marriage is withoug its problems. If it weren't for my being such a saint, my life would be much different.

Divorce is the last resort.

I am really sorry you are going through tough times.

As tough as it is now, you need to have a clear head for the academy. If you are not devoting 100% YOU WILL NOT MAKE IT.

Good luck, the next 4 months are going to be really difficult.
Paul Lepore, Captain
Author of "Smoke Your Firefighter Interview"
www.smokeyourffinterview.com
Think outside of the box!



Posted on 05/12/2004
by tomdeltazulu

Jonah:

Been there, done that, got the hat, got the t-shirt, got the stack of legal paperwork, got the police reports, got the contempt of court orders and got the empty bank account for attorney and court fees. You know what? My daughter was worth it!
While I did not get custody of my daughter for many years, and there was never enough time with her, (There never is!) I have been blessed to have her in my life. Number one daughter is now working part time and is a full time college student working on her teaching credential. I do not hear nor see her very much now but when the phone rings, I am a rich man.

"Divorce is the last resort" indeed! Try to make that plan Z and not plan A. You have options.

Send me an e mail and I will be happy to give you some pointers.



Posted on 05/13/2004
by pumper_bob

Cynical (but realistic) point of view:

1. You are lucky; you and your future ex-wife have brought a beautiful baby into the world that will be your pride and joy for the rest of your life. Amen, brother!

2. You are lucky; your ex will have no claim to that 50% portion of your retirement money for every year that you were married. Amen, brother!

3. You are lucky; your daughter will *not* grow up in a hostile domestic environment that causes her unending psychological issues for the rest of her life. Amen, brother!

So, ultimately you and your daughter will be better off and your ex will soon realize that she gave away the best thing that ever happened to her. Sure, she will have money but, she could have had a firefighter. Poor choice, IMO. Carry on?
Respectfully submitted,
pumper bob



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